Memory fail

I've always held the belief that everything happens for a reason.  That people are meant to be in your life, things are meant to happen; all to make us better people as we make our way through life.  I don't know if it's the sting of hurt that is clouding my judgement or not, but I don't see any good reason for B. I didn't learn anything new about myself.  He didn't change my world for the better. It's the first time I've ever honestly wished I could erase all those memories.  Every time I think of something good that we did or shared--it's tainted by the hurt and anger that I feel now.  Music - something I love - has been hijacked by the fact that it was something I shared with him.  I can't listen to most of my favorite music without a memory being brought to the forefront.  I know it's good that we're not talking, but that hurts too.  We talked for so long-almost 2 years, almost every day.  I just need some good juju back in my life to clear the hurt.  It doesn't help that my daughter is with her dad.  She has always been such a light in my life, keeps me calm and happy.